You Make ALL Things Work Together For MY Good

I really want this blog to be a place where God is glorified, so today I was praying and asking God what it was he wanted me to share...here it is!

I am a sing in the shower kind of girl. For as long as I can remember I have always woken up in the morning with a song in my head. Sometimes it's a kids song, worship song, pop song, old song...but always a song. David sometimes asks me, "What song are you playing this morning?"

I've been listening to Your Love Never Fails over and over this week. I just can't get it out of my spirit...it has been my song for several days. But I'm not just singing it in the morning, it is all day long! If you have never heard it you should go to itunes right now and buy it!

God has been using that song to remind me over and over what he has done in my life. There is a line that says "The chasm was far to wide, I never thought I'd reach the other side, but your love never fails!" There are several times in my life when I have thought I would never get to "the other side" and EVERY time God has gotten me there.

Then of course there is the line that blows my mind every time I say it, "You make all things work together for my good!" I just can't explain the emotions I have when I say those words! When I look back on the things that happened in my life from the time I was a child up until now, and see how God has used EVERY instance for MY good all I can do is praise Him. When I sing the words, I feel like I am going to explode with JOY, THANKFULNESS, LOVE, ADORATION, and AMAZEMENT!

Every experience I thought was negative, sorrowful, and sinful is now being used to glorify God and minister to others. I know the place that I am in now is just another thing God is going to use to glorify himself and I don't want any of the credit. I'm not the one who is in charge of my life, He is. I want to do NOTHING to get in the way of His glory. I trust Him completely, because I know from experience that He makes all things work together for MY good.

I know that I am the APPLE of His eye. The apple of your eye is the pupil-the most sensitive part of your body. You will instinctually protect your eye from any harm. It is protected above all else-just the way God protects you. He doesn't have to think about it. You are His most important priority. It is the ultimate comfort to know that God is protecting me above everything else and even the things that I think cannot possibly be happening for my good, are!

Isaiah 55:8-9 For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways," declares the LORD. "As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts."

Apple a Day

Today was a great day! After work one of my best friends let me live vicariously through her, yet again. As many of you know David and I have been trying to have a baby for 3 years now. We have suffered lots of heartache and disappointment, but are believing that God has a perfect will for our family. That said, this friend has been like my apple a day-keeping the doctor away. Without her, I'm not sure I would have made it through the past year without paying to see a psychiatrist.

She is beautifully pregnant with her first baby girl after 3 boys! I'm still not sure she really believes it's a girl. She let me be there with her when she found out that it was girl, when she picked out the bedding, and today when we put the crib, swing, car seat, and pack-n-play together. We were busy girls! Everything is pink and beautiful!

Even though I wasn't putting this all together for my baby, just getting to be a part of it heals a little place in my heart. Just having someone include me in their miracle, instead of avoid even mentioning it to me, makes me feel like I'm not an outsider in a world full of mommies.

God has blessed me with amazing friends, who show me that I am not alone. So here is my response to God's faithfulness in my life- God, who needs to know they are not alone, that they fit in the body of Christ? Who in my life do I need to work on including? Who seems like they are struggling to fit in or feeling isolated? Let me see with your eyes!

"I know I'm filled to be emptied again. The seed I've received I will sow." Hillsong

Not My Type

I have to admit, I love reading blogs, but I have never been much of a writer. The thought of putting my thoughts, feelings, and revelations in writing makes me want clean the entire house from top to bottom, till up my yard and lay sod, and get a sudden urge to learn everything about car engines. I want to do anything to avoid exposing myself-even if it is only in a journal kept under lock and key between the mattresses. Crazy, right?

I have learned a lot over the past 4 years about the importance of NOT keeping myself guarded. How can God use me and the things he has taught me if I never let anyone really know me? I am still learning how to do this and am by no means as open with my life as I would like to be. Learning to show people the side of me that feels pain and hurt is SO hard. I don't like it-it is uncomfortable! But, I know that when I have had people open up to me and show me their pain and hurt it has made me feel that I'm not alone. I hate that feeling-it is the worst trick in the book! I don't want you to feel alone, because the truth is you are never alone if you have God's Holy Spirit living in you!

So, I am going to open myself up for you and for me. Whether my writings are joyful, sorrowful, rants, raves, inspirational, or confrontational...I want to be open and I want you to know that you are not alone! If no one else will stand by you, I will.

As you may know, or can see from this blog, I love apples! Well, not eating them raw, I'm allergic. But, I love the way they look on trees, in a bowl on my kitchen table, in the big barrels at the farmers market. I love the way they smell-sweet and tart! I love the smooth feel of their skin and the gritty juiciness of their flesh. I love the amazing health benefits locked inside them! They are one of God's greatest creations and He uses them to show His glory to me.

My favorite thing about apples is the story of Johnny Appleseed. He walked across 100, 000 square miles, barefoot, planting apple trees that provided food and livelihood for many generations of settlers. He faced many obstacles and trial along the way. It was not an easy trip! That is what I want to do in my own way. I want to walk the road God has before me, barefoot, baring my heart while planting His seeds to provide His food and His sustenance for many generations. I will surely have bumps, bruises, blisters, and cuts along the way. I have faced and will face trials and mountains I don't know how to move,but God will-and the fruit will be well worth it!